Posted in Life, Philosophy, Psychology

What is the Limit of Sacrifice in Relationships?

We all have different temperaments. Some of us can be extremely selfish, on the other hand some of us tend to consistently compromise on our beloved ones. But to what extent should someone be compromised in her relationships? What is the limit of altruism or selfishness?

In Europe or the USA, people are act more individually compared to the Middle East. In the society I live in, altruism is praised and individuality is considered as selfishness. In Turkey, like the other Mediterranean countries, social relationships are quite important. Here, the opinions of others are more important than the individual’s own wishes. Especially in smaller settlements and more rural areas. That’s why the people here always compromise themselves.

However, compromise is not the same as doing good. Compromise is making sacrifice.

And, sacrifice breeds anger.

To sacrifice is to offer what is your right to someone else. This is doing self-injustice for others. It’s not caring about yourself and not giving yourself the value you deserve. Only those do this who don’t have self-confidence, who don’t love themselves, who haven’t been taught their own value in childhood.

We can do good, but nobody should be expected to sacrifice. Of course, parents compromise to some extent their own wishes, until their children grow up. Because having a child is a responsibility. On the other hand, it is not good to sacrifice even for our parents and siblings.

I’ll tell you why.

While man compromises himself, he actually does evil to both himself and the other.

He does evil to himself because he gives his own to the other. He does harm to the other person because his sacrifice irritates him against the other person and because he takes the responsibility of that person and makes life easier for that person.

If we assume the responsibilities of a person, we won’t do that person a favor since we prevent that person from improving. People can only progress by fulfilling their responsibilities, straining, struggling, and trying again and again.

Besides, we begin to feel hostile to the people we sacrificed. Thus, our relationship gets worse over time. 

If we want to be loved or help people, we should encourage people in their struggles rather than compromise on ourselves.

When making a decision, we must ask ourselves if we really want it. Are we making this decision for someone else? We should not ignore our own wishes.

We all have our own lives.

The free man is not the one who does what he wants; but the one who doesn’t do what he doesn’t want to do.

It may be necessary to make some sacrifices for our loved ones, sometimes. Actually I also make MANY sacrifices and compromise myself. That’s how I was raised, unfortunately.

But we have to make sure we don’t exceed the limit.

Posted in Health, Lifestyle, Motivation, Psychology

Get These 5 Habits and Become the Healthiest Person in The World

These are things I’ve been doing for years.

Sometimes I fail. But generally I try to do them.

1. Eat a dessertspoon of blossom honey on an empty stomach in the morning.

Because it boosts the metabolism. As I mentioned before, our colons must be empty in the morning. Otherwise, various bacteria increase in our intestines and we get sick over time.

Honey is antioxidant, antiseptic and cholesterol-free. It restores defense system. Getting rid of toxins, it helps having a healthier skin. Enables weight loss. Improves sleep quality.

It also quite beneficial for mental health and well-being. Honey calms nerves, provides relaxation and increases serotonin in the blood. It’s essential for psychological stability. Besides, eating honey improves mental abilities. Additionally, it’s beneficial for memory. 

Thus, it provides the productivity through the day.

And more…

2. Drink a glass of water at 6 am and stay awake.

Drink water before you get your coffee. Rehydrate your body. It makes you feel energetic.

Simply, drinking water provides the same benefits as eating honey. 

You can also drink your first glass of water in the morning with a little lemon squash or vinegar. This allows your body to be cleansed of more toxins.

We should drink enough water, but stop drinking one hour before our meals. If we drink water just before eating, the digestive juices in our stomach will drain away.

In addition, we should not drink water for two hours after meals to avoid sending food that has not been fully digested into our intestines.

If we are eating a dry meal, we can drink half a glass of beverage during the meal.

3. An hour after drinking water, eat fruit.

If we eat fruit before breakfast, we will get a lighter food first. 

If we eat fruit half an hour before meals, we will meet our body’s sugar need. This helps us eat less.

Also, fruits take considerably shorter to digest. Therefore, fruits should be consumed before meals.

And keep this in mind; eating a pinch of salt while starting a meal creates a protective shield inside your stomach.

4. Eat two meals a day: Breakfast and dinner.

We care very much about nutrition. According to an ancient teaching, the cause of all troubles is satiety. It’s not the cause of just all the “illnesses”, but all the “troubles”!

When our body is not digesting, it repairs itself. So, our immune system steps in if we’re hungry. Having a fever or a headache when we are hungry indicates that our body is in treatment.

Make sure you don’t eat anything for about 10 hours after breakfast.

Don’t eat dinner too early or too late. If you eat too early, you cannot sleep because of hunger. If you eat too late, what you eat will disturb you all night long. Remember, digestion stops completely after 9 pm.

5. Avoid sugar, gluten and all packaged foods.

Today we probably all know that these are very harmful to health. But we may not know exactly what they are doing us.

Gluten is actually harmful to all of us, not just people with celiac disease. Because our digestive systems treat gluten like sugar.

Sugar increases harmful bacteria in the intestines, damages the digestive system and weakens the immune system. Makes you feel sluggish and hungry, causes tooth decay and increases the risks of obesity, heart disease, diabetes and also various forms of cancer. It increases stress, causes psychological instability, weakens consciousness, slows down brain functions and causes early aging both mentally and physically.

Prefer to eat fresh foods instead of packaged foods containing additives. If possible, prepare your own meals.

Posted in Health, Lifestyle, List, Motivation, Psychology

Advices For Psychological Well-Being

My life is currently in a huge mess. I’d like to explain my psychology and how it affects my physical health in a bad way. But no longer I want to focus on unfavorable things about my life.

Instead, let’s talk about the solutions.

Normally, when something goes wrong in my life, I try to fix my sleeping schedule. Getting up early helps me a lot. If I start the day early, I feel good and spend my day productively. By time, I stick on a diet. Doing something beneficial for myself motivates me and I keep striving. 

However, this time I need to feel better first.

I have listed down the things I need to do. They all easy to advise but don’t seem that easy to practise.

10 Rules For Sustaining Mental Health

Rule #1

STOP COMPLAINING neither to anybody nor on your own. Don’t waste your time with it. Overthinking and talking about what annoys you make your psychology even worse. Instead, discuss the possible solutions. 

Rule #2

STOP CRITICIZING other people. Accept them as they are. Rather than focusing on other people’s mistakes, tackle your own faults. Question your own attitudes.

Rule #3

TAKE LESSONS. Every difficulty teaches us. Make a step. Train yourself for being a better person. You definitely can’t change anybody. But you can change yourself. Do your best.

Rule #4

LOOK AT THE BRIGHT SIDE. Every negativity has something positive on flip side. Change your standpoint. Look at the favorable aspects.

Rule #5

DO MORE WHAT YOU LOVE. Do the things more frequently that’s makes you feel good. Keep your mind busy. 

Rule #6

TELL WHAT IS ON TRACK to your loved ones. Talk more about the pleasing things. Don’t make people worry about you too much. If you are all right, your family and friends will be all right too.

Rule #7

DON’T BLAME ON YOU BECAUSE OF YOUR ANGER. No anger is reasonless. Anger is not a feeling but a signal. Try to understand your feelings by looking at your anger. Find your anger’s why.

RULE #8

ALLOW YOURSELF TO EXPERIENCE YOUR SORROW. It’s okay being sad. That’s life. Don’t rush to get back your usual mental state. Also, don’t force yourself to seem happy if you’re not.

RULE #9

DON’T COMPARE YOUR PROBLEMS WITH OTHER’S. Everybody has their own difficulties. Don’t underestimate your troubles. Don’t feel bad by looking other people’s problems.

RULE #10

TELLING PEOPLE THEIR MISTAKES DOESN’T MAKES YOU A BAD PERSON. Instead of talking people’s behind, talk with themselves directly. Tell the problems kindly. Don’t keep quiet because of the worry of making people sad. Don’t burn yourself out for pleasing people around you. Don’t push your satisfaction and happiness into the background.

BONUS

ENHANCE YOUR KNOWLEDGE. Knowledge is power. Read, listen, watch. Interact with people. Always learn new things.


These are my recommendations for psychological well-being.

I wonder your suggestions.

Let me know them below 🙂

Posted in Life, Motivation, Psychology

Handling My New Reality

This year we are facing with a lot of disasters, as you know. Only Covid-19 pandemic is enough to make us feel depressed. However, my private life has its own “disasters” too. 

I’m having really tough times. Probably the worst ever. There is a whole change in my life. Even my routine has FULLY changed. 

I’m not the one who responsible for what happened. But the situations affect me anyway.

To be honest, I believe I have kept being strong. And actually, I haven’t felt that strong before. (Still, I complained a lot.)

I should pull myself together.

I know I can’t bring back the old days; but I can adapt to my new reality. I just have to.

You’ll never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine.

John C. Maxwell

Step by step, I’m going to establish a routine for maintaining psychological well-being and productivity. But this time, it’s not gonna be an experimentation. Eventually, I think I need consistency. I want to have lifetime routines. 

More or less I discovered how any habit affects myself.  I virtually learned what makes me satisfied or depressed.

All of my sadness, anger or worries are root in my disappointments only about myself.

Unless I achieve being myself, I won’t be truly happy. Unless I live life how I want to live it, I won’t be satisfied.

I have an ideal life that I somehow try to catch it. While sometimes I’m so determined and productive, other times my dreams seem too gorgeous to me then I don’t even make an effort to touch them.

This giving up periods are impeding my progress. To make my dreams come true I should always be on my way. Maybe I can’t go forward every time, at least I need to keep my position, my distance; I mean my closeness with my dreams. 

The ability to change constantly and effectively is made easier by high-level continuity.

Michael Porter

If we agree on 2020 is the worst year ever, just let me know that.

Posted in Life, Lifestyle, List, Motivation, Philosophy, Psychology

15 Things I Have Learned From My Experiences

Trying to find a better way of living, I have made too many changes in my life. They all were kinda experiments. If you haven’t read yet, you may check out My Story first.

Here what I have learned from experiencing different lifestyles:

  1. There are various ways of living but none of them is “certainly preferable”. They all have their own difficulties besides their own beauties.
  2. We able to adapt to any situation we if have to. We actually able to change in any sense. It’s possible. But we prefer staying where we feel pleased.
  3. All of our thoughts and beliefs are shaped accordingly our position. If we had different experiences, we look and see different. That’s why judging and condemning people is improper. No one is incomprehensible.
  4. Discovering ourselves is as educational as discovering the world outside. So, “traveling” can be inner as well.
  5. We all get from life exactly what we wanted. There are no excuses. If it didn’t happen, that means actually we didn’t want it to happen.
  6. If we able to dream anything, somehow we able to do it.
  7. We mostly tend to tolerate because we suppose that we have to. But nothing or no one is our only choice. We just need to discover what we truly want in our lives and be brave.
  8. Giving a break is something good. We may end up arriving where we were started -but this time we have the reason of being there. This time we sure that this is the place we should to be.
  9. If we move away from something, then we realize how it affects us. And when we know how anything affects us, life is getting more enjoyable.
  10. If we don’t have mental health or we don’t feel happy, we’re not able to achieve anything. So, we shouldn’t underestimate what makes us happy and gives us joy.
  11. If we are not able to help ourselves, we neither can’t help others.
  12. Difficulties and crisis are great teachers. They eventually enhance the quality of our lives.
  13. If there is a problem, we basically try to solve it. It’s okay. But what if we can’t see any problems? Are we sure that there isn’t any? Not noticing the existing problems much worse than having problems.
  14. Both being alone and surrounding by people are beneficial as well as they may be harmful. Adjusting the balance with social life is so critical.
  15. We don’t need to tell about ourselves. Somehow people understand, feel and see who we are indeed.

I’m sure that we agree on most of them. Let me know what you think!